How to Overcome Insecurities, Mom Guilt, & Self-Criticism

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We’ve all dealt with it before, feeling like we are not good enough. Thoughts that we aren’t doing a good enough job…like we’re doing it all wrong. You may have found that you criticized yourself sometime last week. Maybe you’re a mom and you feel guilty because you are comparing yourself to another mom. No matter what it is, we’ve all been there and today you’ll learn how to overcome insecurities, mom guilt, and self-criticism.

A Dream that Teaches a Lesson

I woke up from a dream that the Holy Spirit used to show me something. I believe this may be of encouragement for you as well. Here was my dream:

I was lined up amongst other women. There was a female authority who was about to judge each of us. She was explaining her expectations to us. She explained the way she expected to us be dressed, and if she found that we didn’t follow her dress code, then we would be disqualified.

When it was my group’s turn to go before her, a random girl began talking to me. She asked me why I was dressed the way that I was. I was wearing a modest outfit. A green blouse and a long black skirt that stopped at my ankles. I thought to myself I’m dressed modestly. There is nothing wrong with the way that I’m dressed. 

The Comparison Trap

She asked me why I was dressed like I was going to church and said that I should wear something other than church clothes when I’m out in public.

She continued to tell me that the quality of my clothing wasn’t good enough. This young lady explained that she felt that I should be wearing more expensive clothing like she was. When I looked at her, there wasn’t anything spectacular or outstanding about what she was wearing.

However, as we anxiously waited in line to be judged, I remember insecurities began to flood me. In this dream, I began to scrutinize my clothes and my hair. I began to feel insecure. I began to worry that I wasn’t good enough. The thoughts flooded my mind as I looked at myself in the mirror. The same girl stood next to me and whispered in my ear and said, “I hate you!”

I made sure to look like it didn’t phase me. I gathered my confidence, picked my head up, and told her to shut up. From that moment on, she left me alone. By the time it was time for me to say my introduction before the judge, I noticed that she wasn’t displeased with me at all. In fact, no one else was critical of me. They were content as they listened to me speak and moved on to the next person. Some were barely even paying attention! My worries and insecurities were in vain.

Where Does Insecurity Come From? 

There are many of us who are doing our best to do the right thing. We are intentional about living for God and being obedient to His word. We are loving our husbands and children the best we can. We’re constantly praying and learning how we can improve in our role as Christian women, wives, and mothers. 

Here are some great reads to keep you motivated and encouraged

The Lord revealed to me that the young lady in my dream represented the enemy, Satan. He comes to us and whispers into our ears to tell us that we aren’t good enough. He says that we aren’t doing a good job. The enemy gets us onto places like social media and into our friend groups and encourages us to compare ourselves to other women. He tells us we should be doing better than we are.

I want to remind you today, that Satan is a liar!

…For you are the children of your father the devil, and you love to do the evil things he does. He was a murderer from the beginning. He has always hated the truth, because there is no truth in him. When he lies, it is consistent with his character; for he is a liar and the father of lies.

John 8:44

As we see in the scripture above, He literally lies. That is who he is. So when he whispers things to you and places ideas in your head, remember that none of it is true. He’s messing with you and trying to get into your head because he hates you. He hates the truth. He ultimately hates God and you are a daughter of God.

It’s a Spiritual Battle

In that dream, I was following the dress code that was laid out for me. I was doing my best to be found pleasing to the judge, yet, that young lady continued to try to deter me. 

In the same way, you may find that you are intentional about living according to the Bible and being obedient to God, but the enemy is still working to discourage you and fill you with insecurities, self-criticism, or mom guilt. But God gives us a solution to overcome insecurities.

The Bible is the Solution to Overcome Insecurities

I want to encourage you to stand on God’s word. Only believe what Jesus says about you in His word. What He says and thinks about you is what is true. That is what we must cling to. This is the key to overcoming insecurities, mom guilt, and self-criticism.

Jesus told him, “I am the way, the truth, and the life. No one can come to the Father except through me.

John 14:6 NLT

We must meditate on the word of God day and night. This is how we renew our minds and purge our thoughts of the enemy’s lies. This is one way we can get out of the comparison trap.

Don’t copy the behavior and customs of this world, but let God transform you into a new person by changing the way you think. Then you will learn to know God’s will for you, which is good and pleasing and perfect. 

Romans 12:1 

When we do this, we will quickly be able to cast down the lies of the enemy and speak what God says about us.

Casting down imaginations, and every high thing that exalteth itself against the knowledge of God, and bringing into captivity every thought to the obedience of Christ;

2 Corinthians 10:5 KJV

So, whatever insecurities, guilt, or self-criticism you may be battling with today remember that as long as you are committed to being obedient to God and allowing Him to work in you, those negative thoughts and feelings are lies. Whenever Satan comes to whisper his lies into your ear, tell him to shut up. Then, speak God’s word out loud.

Looking to grow in your faith as a mother? Read How I Walk By Faith as a Mom next!

In addition to your Bible, here is a great Christian book to help you shift your mindset and maintain positive thinking: