The kids were fighting over who got to hang the next ornament, the baby was crying, and Shania was elbow-deep in cookie dough she’d promised to bake for the school party. Her husband walked in asking about dinner, and she nearly snapped—this wasn’t the magical holiday moment she’d imagined. She wanted to enjoy the season, but between the endless commitments, family expectations, and her own desire to make everything "perfect," she felt completely overwhelmed. That’s when she realized something had to change—because if she kept chasing perfection, she’d miss the beauty right in front of her. 

Can you relate?

1. Remember the Purpose: Gratitude and Worship

Before the commencement of the holiday season, mentally prepare yourself of the purpose. Why do we celebrate the holiday in the first place? For Thanksgiving, it is to practice gratitude and reflect on the many blessings God has bestowed upon us.

Christmas is a time of worship and reverence as we reflect on the birth of our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ. He was born to sacrifice His life for humanity. 

When we enter the holiday season with the right purpose, it is easier to avoid getting too caught up in the holiday hustle. When you are tempted to feel overwhelmed, ask yourself the following questions:

• Will God still be glorified?
• What am I celebrating?
• One week from now, will I consider this a big issue or a small issue?
• Do I need to take a break and regroup?
• Should I remove something from my plate or ask for help?

2. Peacefully Prioritize What Matters Most 

Emphasize peace as you prioritize what matters most this holiday season. What do you want your holiday to be centered around? Prioritize the things that help you honor and worship God, spend quality time with your family, and enjoy special traditions.

Let go of any unrealistic expectations and instead focus on Christ-centered memories. Are you and your husband loving toward one another and enjoying your time together? Are your children learning about the true meaning and reason for the holiday? Can they see Christ in it? Answering such questions helps you prioritize building a legacy rather than solely passing down holiday traditions.

3. Plan Ahead

Use your planner! As you plan, be sure to schedule time to rest and be flexible when needed. Avoid waiting until the last minute to cook, decorate, and complete holiday tasks.

Consider cooking days or even weeks in advance. Many foods like mac n cheese, sweet potato pies, collard greens, dressing, etc. can be prepared, cooled, and frozen days, weeks, or even months in advance. When stored properly they taste just as delicious as they would had you prepared it that day.

Another option is to spread your cooking out over the week. Cook 1-3 dishes a day during the week of that holiday to avoid cooking all the items on the day of the holiday.

Do the same when it comes to shopping, preparing decorations, and wrapping gifts. When you plan and complete tasks ahead of time, you have less to do on the actual holiday. This will allow you to put your feet up, rest, and be present in the moment as you celebrate with those you love. 

4. Set Boundaries with Love

Remember, it’s okay to lovingly say no. Be clear about what your family can and cannot commit to. You are not obligated to participate in something just because you have in the past. If it will put too much strain, stress, or unhappiness on your family, politely decline. 

With delicate matters, consider offering an alternative way to go about it. For example, you may need to decline baking pies for a bake sale this year, but you can offer to call a catering company to provide pies. Or maybe you can’t cook the whole Thanksgiving dinner alone this year, but you are happy to host if others volunteer to bring side dishes. 

Be sure to communicate expectations with extended family ahead of time to avoid misunderstandings.

5. Keep it Simple, Sis

Don’t overcomplicate things. Opt for simple over extensive. Select meaningful traditions that align with your values rather than trying to do it all. 

Simplify your meals, gift-giving, and decorations. Consider how you can do everything in a thoughtful way rather than focusing on being extravagant. Complicated and extravagant means there is potential for more stress and overwhelm. Instead, do it well, but do it simple.

6. Involve the Whole Family

Invite your children to participate in age-appropriate tasks like helping bake cookies, decorating, or wrapping gifts. Solicit your husband’s help as necessary. If you’re busy cooking, respectfully ask him to take out the trash when it’s full, load the dishwasher, entertain guests, or dry dishes. 

Family teamwork will help lighten your load. You can use these activities as teachable moments to instill good values and teach about the joy of giving and the story of Christ.

7. Limit Social Media (Be Present)

Avoid scrolling on social media during the holiday season. This will help you avoid comparing your holiday celebrations to others. Social media can amplify unrealistic expectations and foster discontentment.

Instead, use this time to focus on your family and the real meaning of the season. Be present in the moment and cherish the people you get to spend this holiday season with.

Wrapping Up How to Avoid Stress and Drama This Season

The holidays don’t have to be perfect to be meaningful. When you focus on what truly matters—faith, family, and creating a peaceful home—you can let go of the stress and embrace the joy of the holiday season. 

This year, give yourself permission to keep it simple, set boundaries, and enjoy the moments that matter most. After all, the greatest gift you can give your family is a calm and joyful heart as you worship God together.